Things We Never Said
by Nightsailer
Summary: "You and I were not meant to be lovers. You and I were not meant to be friends. You and I were not meant to be anything more than master and slave. You and I were simply meant to be." Unspoken love, lust and longing bound by the chains of duty, honor and fear may have separated master and servant, but their thoughts have always been as one.
1. Dark Chest of Wonders

Synopsis: My heart began to race as I met his gaze. My breath came faster, and somehow I could feel him goading me. Daring me. Urging me to do what I knew I had to do. It was as if he was screaming at me, the same words, over and over.

Do it.

DO IT.

**DO IT.**

You and I were not meant to be lovers. You and I were not meant to be friends. You and I were not meant to be anything more than master and slave. You and I were simply meant to be.

((A/N: This fanfiction is based on the canon story of Hellsing. It includes some elaborations of scenes from the series as well as original scenes from the 'gap years' between events. It explores the unspoken relationship between Alucard and Integra, starting with the day of their meeting and progressing through the years they spent as master and servant. Each chapter is based on a song by Nightwish, which is used as inspiration for each of the scenes. I highly encourage my readers to look up the lyrics and/or listen to the songs, as I believe they compliment the emotionality of this bit of fanfiction. I used various scenes from the series to delve into the deepest thoughts and desires experienced by one of the most lustful, deeply attached and unrequited couples of anime. In order to keep the story as canon as possible, I used direct quotes from the series. I DO NOT OWN HELLSING or the songs from Nightwish on which the chapters are based. I will reference the episodes I use at the end of each chapter. Now that the disclaimers are done, please enjoy, and R&R!))

**Dark Chest of Wonders**

_How could this be happening?_

_How could he do this?_

_Why isn't Walter here?_

_What am I going to do?_

_Am I going to die?_

_I don't want to die._

My feet beat the marble beneath me. My breath came in ragged gasps. My blood raced through my veins, and my heart pounded so loudly I could hear it ringing in my ears.

_I'm going to die._

"There's no use running, my lovely little niece." My uncle's voice echoed down the hall, the sound of his hollow, remorseless baritone chilling me to the bone. "My men have this place surrounded. There is no way out." I could hear him draw the slide of his prized Colt 1911 .45 ACP. It was a gift from my father, given to him with love on his fortieth birthday. I could still picture the winning smile on my father's face as he watched his brother unwrap the package. He was ecstatic to give my uncle the crowning jewel of his collection.

_What a monster._

My thoughts blurred together as I desperately tried to formulate a plan. The armory was on the other side of the mansion; I would have to get past my uncle if I was to reach it. My father's office held a small gun-cabinet with several firearms and a compartment full of ammunition, but the key was left in the drawer of his bedside table upon his passing. My only hope was to retrieve the small handgun from my bedroom down the hall, and I prayed that he hadn't already sent someone there to head me off.

I rounded the corner at top speed. The toe of my boot caught the edge of the oriental rug, and I barely managed to catch myself on the small, mahogany table next to the wall, sending the expensive Tiffany lamp crashing to the ground. I bit back the despairing cry that threatened to escape my dry, chafing lips, scrambling to throw myself back into a sprint as I heard my pursuers hasten their pace.

"You're making this so easy, little fräulein," I heard him chuckle. "I would have thought your father would have taught you a little stealth when fleeing your enemies."

I felt my teeth grind together, the muscle in my jaw working against the tears stinging the backs of my eyes. Where was Walter? Why wasn't he there, standing between me and my murderous coward of an uncle? Had he not sworn to my father's face that he would protect me from evil?

My hand found the handle of the door to my room, nearly ripping it from its screws as I flung open the door and rushed inside. I quickly threw the bolt, then rushed to my vanity, yanking open the drawer and grabbing my gun with trembling hands. I pulled the clip, praying I had remembered to reload it after my last bout at the firing range.

Three bullets left.

My heart sank. Even if I managed to kill my uncle, there was no way I would be able to rid myself of his entourage. I shoved the clip back into the gun and collapsed into the chair in front of the mirror, briefly allowing the panic to overwhelm me.

_I'm going to die._

"Get a grip," I whispered, wrapping my arms around myself to try to quell the wave of nausea rising from the pit of my stomach. "There may still be a way to get out of this, but not if you just sit here and weep like a child." I drew a couple of deep breaths, then began running through my options once more. My fourth story window was too high to jump. Even if I survived, I would be so badly injured that I would simply have to wait for my uncle to find me and put a bullet in my head. If I opened the door, I risked drawing even more attention to myself.

"What the hell am I going to do?" I wondered aloud, tossing back my head and running my hands across my sweaty face, knocking my glasses askew. I opened my eyes and frowned at the fuzzy ceiling, reaching back up to right my glasses on the bridge of my nose. The grate of the vent stared back at me, and for a moment, I imagined the screws to be eyes, and the metal bars to be the teeth of a wide, leering mouth…

Suddenly, my heart leapt into my throat. The air ducts! Of course! In moments I was clambering up onto my chair, stuffing my pistol into the waistband of my skirt as I fumbled in my pocket for a coin to use as a screwdriver. My panicked hands nearly dropped the 1 euro coin several times as I attempted to force it into the head of the screw, but eventually managed to remove the plate, tossing it onto my bed to keep it from clattering to the tile. Realizing that I wasn't tall enough to get myself into the duct with only the chair, I jumped back to the floor, kicking the seat aside as I rushed over to shove my vanity under the hole.

I jumped up onto the polished wood, planting my foot on the stack of schoolbooks for an extra boost as I pulled myself into the air duct. I was instantly accosted by centuries of dust. My eyes watered and my throat seized, and I couldn't keep myself from coughing violently into my sleeve. The ventilation shaft loomed eerily before me, dust and cobwebs illuminated every thirty feet or so through the small windows into the rooms.

I forced myself forward, bleary eyes struggling to focus as I pulled my shirt up over my face. The makeshift mask helped a bit, but I still found myself unable to resist the urge to cough as I scooted myself down the metal duct. Eventually I found myself above the vent in the hallway, and I stopped short, holding my breath as I saw my uncle getting ready to pass beneath my feet.

"I wish I could help you understand." He flicked the gun in his hand, readying it for the killing shot. "Twenty years. Twenty years I spent waiting for my brother, your father to die, and then mere hours before his death, he chooses you to succeed him as the head of the family. This insult against me I cannot accept. I will NEVER accept…what an unforgivable act of betrayal." He drew the slide once more, having fired a warning shot down the hall when he heard me crash into the table. "Hellsing is mine!"

I felt the dust begin to tickle the back of my throat once more. I squeezed my eyes shut, sending tears from dust and fear cascading down my cheeks as I tried not to breathe. Was this man…this monster…really the same person I had known since my birth?

I watched him until he was out of sight, then rushed forward as quietly as I could, still resisting the unrelenting urge to cough until my lungs were sore until I reached the end of the shaft. When I could bear it no longer, I covered my mouth with my sleeve, nearly banging my head off the bottom of the shaft with the spasms of coughing that wracked my body. Once I was finally able to breathe again, I opened my watering eyes to see the seemingly bottomless dropoff that led to the central air duct. I bit my lip, wondering if I could manage the sheer drop without losing a limb.

A dull, hopeless laugh tickled my throat. What choice did I have?

I swung my legs over the side of the metal precipice, placing my palms against the walls of the shaft as I eased my weight into the yawning void. Pressing the soles of my boots against the smooth, aluminum surface, I used the friction between my shoes and the wall to lower myself slowly down the chute.

Two flights passed uneventfully. However, once I reached the main floor, a rusted panel gave way under my foot, sending me tumbling through the remainder of the shaft in a tangle of arms and legs. I eventually hit the bottom; my fall was broken by the carcasses of dead animals that had become trapped in the ventilation system. I could vaguely make out the grinning skeleton of a bat in the dim light from the shaft above me, and I couldn't suppress a small grimace.

_Now what?_ I thought to myself, casting my eyes down the dark air duct before me. _I fell so far… I have to be in the sublevels. _I felt the fear begin to rise once more. The only way out of the sublevels was through the hidden door behind the mirror in the main hall, which was surely crawling with my uncle's men.

_Integra._

My eyes went wide. I could hear my father's voice as clearly as if he was sitting in the muck beside me. My mind flashed the day of his death before my eyes. I could see his harrowed face, his wasted body, his thinning hair…

_If the time should ever come, when all other hope is lost…if you should find yourself surrounded with your enemies closing in…go to the last cell of the deepest dungeon of the estate. There lies one of the Hellsing family's darkest legacies. It will be the instrument of your salvation._

I licked my lips as I stared off down the air shaft, then instantly regretted it when I tasted the bitter flavor of dust. What on earth could he have hidden in the dungeons that could possibly save me from my uncle's greed?

_Whatever it is, it's my only chance._

Steeling myself against the unknown, I made sure my gun was secured at my side, then picked my way through the debris, feeling along the corpse-littered floor of the air duct for the first grate. When my fingertips connected with the ridges of the plate, I paused long enough to shift my legs out in front of me, praying the screws had rusted through as I began slamming the heel of my boot into the grate. I winced each time my foot connected with the ancient bit of steel, knowing that the sound of my frantic kicks would reverberate through every air duct in the manor. Eventually the plate gave way, clattering to the stone below with a hollow clang.

Without giving myself time to panic, I quickly lowered myself through the hole, dangling by my fingers for just a moment before dropping unceremoniously to the ground.

The stale scent of earth and mildew mingled with the faint odor of death in the nearly pitch black hallway. I could hear the rats scurry away from me, and I felt the hair-raising touch of their matted fur as they brushed against my boots. I found myself agonizing over forgetting to grab a flashlight.

This thought was short lived. I heard the bolt being thrown from the secret door at the top of the stairs down the hall, and soon the windowless corridor was flooded with flickering light as my uncle threw the ancient switch.

I was instantly in motion. Once again my feet pounded the floor as I sprinted toward the end of the hall, barely managing to avoid catching the toe of my boot on the uneven stonework. I could hear my uncle and his entourage descending the stairs. Whatever my father had in the last cell of this dungeon had become my only hope.

Finally reaching the end of the hall, I turned to the old iron door, grasping the handle and giving it the hardest shove I could muster. The simple mechanism groaned and creaked, but eventually gave beneath my hand in a shower of rust. Ancient hinges protested loudly as I swung open the door, revealing the instrument of my salvation.

A corpse.

I stared in disbelief at the desiccated figure before me. Dry black hair cascaded across an eyeless skull. Cracked black leather bound the bony frame from head to toe. Spiders had formed an intricate cocoon around the lifeless body, which stared at me through soulless black sockets.

"How could this…corpse…be my salvation?" I asked the otherwise empty room, feeling my heart sink into my boots.

The sound of a safety being released was my only answer.

"There you are, my fräulein," my uncle crowed, sneering down at me with a triumphant grin. His finger tightened on the trigger, and the loud thunderclap of the gun echoed through the dungeons.

I screamed. My arm was suddenly on fire. The bullet had passed clean through the flesh of my shoulder, narrowly missing the bone as it sent a spatter of blood cascading across the tiny cell. The force of the blast sent me tumbling to the floor, and I barely managed to catch myself on my elbows.

"U-uncle!" I protested, hating myself for the pain I could hear in my own voice as I watched him approach, weapon raised.

"Something on your mind, my little fräulein?" he taunted, knowing he had won.

The mocking tone of his voice grated in my ears, momentarily shoving my fear to the back of my mind as rage bubbled up in its place.

"Are you really so desperate to claim the family title that you'd actually be willing to…"

"What an astute observation, Integra." The muzzle of the gun nosed its way into my face, and he cocked the hammer as he prepared to fire.

_I'm going to die._

Though these panicked words echoed through my mind, I managed to hold his gaze. Maybe it was my stubbornness. Maybe it was the bit of my father in me. Maybe both. Whatever it was, it prevented me from cowering or begging for my life, and I stood firm before him, prepared to meet my death spitting in the face of my attacker.

What happened next changed my life forever.

I saw my uncle's eyes go wide. The sickening, slurping sound of a tongue being dragged across the floor reached my ears. The reflection of a dull red glow appeared in my uncle's wide, unblinking eyes.

"Oh God…" he choked out. "The corpse…!"

I forced myself to turn around. The body against the far wall had risen to its feet, the muscles of its bound arms straining ominously against the leather bonds until they burst at the seams. Red eyes were fixated on the man who sought to kill me, and from its fangs dripped the remnants of crimson blood.

My blood.

My uncle stumbled back, raising his weapon to take aim at the creature who had risen from the dead. "Sh-shoot it!" he howled. His men managed to pull themselves together, quickly drawing their weapons and unloading round after round into the thing before them. The reanimated corpse shot forward at lightning speed, throwing me against the wall behind it as it planted its arm in front of me. A shower of bullets littered the outside of its arm, embedding themselves in its flesh mere centimeters from my face.

"Dogs," it hissed, its voice deep and mocking as it turned to look over its shoulder at its attackers. "Do you really believe cowards such as yourself could possibly command the forces of Hellsing?" Spears of shadow flooded across the floor, impaling my uncle's two guards before driving their writhing corpses into the wall.  
"Wh—what are you?!" my uncle cried. His finger continued to pull the trigger, despite the fact that all of his rounds were now firmly embedded in the creature's arm.

The thing that had become my shield paid him no mind. Instead, it turned its burning red eyes on me.

In that brief, terror-stricken moment, I saw something I would never forget. I saw…

…nothing.

My heart began to race as I met his gaze. My breath came faster, and somehow I could feel him goading me. Daring me. Urging me to do what I knew I had to do. It was as if he was screaming at me, the same words, over and over.

Do it.

DO IT.

**DO IT.**

The hand I hadn't realized was on the handle of my gun tightened around the weapon. I held the creature's gaze as I raised the pistol over his arm, breaking eye contact only when it came time to aim my sights. My finger wrapped around the trigger, and before I knew it, I had put a bullet through my uncle's head.

A tendril of smoke filtered from the muzzle of my gun. I kept my gaze fixated on the place my uncle had fallen, unwilling to look back into the void in the center of those cold red eyes.

"…what's your name?" I asked quietly, though somehow I felt I already knew the answer.

"My master." His words shot through me like a jolt of electricity, burning themselves into my heart with a blade of red-hot steel. "Your father called me…"

I watched him bow his head, his powerful body slumped before me in the visage of utter and total submission. My thoughts whirled through my head, thinking back to everything my father had ever told me about the vampires whose fates my family commanded. How could this thing…this monster…call me master? Who was this beautiful, hideous guardian angel of death who had saved me? What had I unleashed?

_What power do I have, that I could command a creature such as this?_

I waited with bated breath for his response, repulsed yet fascinated by the creature who bowed at my feet.

"…Alucard."

((Quotes taken from Hellsing Ultimate: OVA 1))

R&R!


	2. For the Hearth I Once Had

**For the Heart I Once Had**

"Miss Integra?"

The sound of a fist beating on my door shook me from my restless sleep. I had spent the night wrestling with the nightmares that had haunted me since the night in the dungeons: always being chased, always having to kill instead of looking into those cold, red eyes…

"Miss Integra!"

The pounding knock came again, and this time I was awake enough to recognize the voice of my butler, Walter C. Dornez: the man who had left me at the mercy of my uncle and his band of miscreants. I glared blearily at the line of light beneath the door, then fumbled around on the bedside table for my glasses.

"I'm awake," I grumbled, nearly poking myself in the eye with the earpiece as I shoved the frames onto my face. Kicking the covers from overtop of me, I flopped myself over so I could sit up, stretching my arms over my head as I allowed myself a huge yawn. "Let me guess, I have more papers to sign," I muttered, reaching over to turn on the lamp on the nightstand. Artificial light flooded my bedroom, casting its dull golden glow across the checkerboard tile.

"Hardly, ma'am." Though his tone was measured and calm, I had known Walter long enough to be able to pick out the amusement in his voice. "We have something much more pressing than frivolous legalities at hand."

I blinked, frowning as I tried to recall my calendar in my head. I had thought my first meeting with the Round Table Conference wasn't set to occur for at least another week. "I see. I'll be dressed shortly." I slid to my feet, combing my fingers sleepily through my hair as I moved to open the curtains, hoping to let in some sunlight. The silver rings shifted quietly across the curtain rod as I drew back the heavy swaths of blue velvet, and I paused, staring blankly at my back-lit reflection as my mind began to race.

The gardens were pitch black.

"You might want to wear something bulletproof," Walter said idly. "Of course, it won't do much against our enemy, but it might shield you from the friendly fire."

"…I thought our men would be trained better than that," I forced out, closing the curtains once more.

"Terrified men are hardly fine marksmen. I would suggest staying behind them until their guns are empty."

I felt a shiver run down my spine. "…Walter," I managed at last, forcing his name through dry lips. "…where are we going?"

"To do our job, ma'am." I heard his heels click together, and I could picture him giving me his stiff, trademark bow. "I trust you haven't forgotten that your father's legacy is more than just a pile of paperwork and a room full of musty old chaps."

My eyes darted across the room to my closet, where my newly-minted uniform and my bullet-proof vest hung, pressed and polished, from the back of the door. Once again my thoughts descended into the sublevels, reentering the room with the glowing red eyes.

"My father's legacy," I murmured, wrapping my arms around myself. "Right."

"Do try to hurry along," Walter said cheerfully. "The creature is making a rather dreadful mess of St. Albans."

His words shot through me like a jolt of electricity, springing me back to reality. Now was not the time for puerile insecurities. "Five minutes," I called, steeling myself against my fears as I strode across the tile toward my closet.

"We will meet you at the heliport, ma'am."

I waited until his footsteps had disappeared down the hall, then took a deep breath and pulled open the door. The hanger scraped against the wood, the heavy fabric of my brown, military-grade uniform swinging like a pendulum from the hook. Polished golden buttons glimmered brightly in the lamp-light, reflecting the scared little twelve year old I knew I was.

"In the name of God," I whispered, reaching up with trembling hands to remove the hanger from its hook. Somehow my father's prayer seemed right upon my lips, and I took heart as I retrieved my bulletproof vest from the rack. "Impure souls of the living dead shall be banished into eternal damnation. Amen."

)( )( )( )( )( )( )( )( )( )( )( )(

Ten minutes later, I was walking down the hall toward the stairs leading to the heliport. I felt small in the heavy, oversized layers of my uniform; my seamstress insisted I would grow into them within a few months, but for now, they simply made me feel as if I was drowning in my own clothing. The only things that seemed right were the sword at my hip and the gun in my holster, and even these gave me the feeling that I was little more than a toddler stumbling about in his father's shoes.

I stopped at the brightly painted metal door for just a moment, taking a few deep breaths to calm my racing heart. Part of me wondered if Walter might disappear again, leaving me to face yet another life-or-death situation by myself.

_But I wouldn't be alone, would I?_

I swallowed hard, then pushed open the door, climbing the winding metal steps up to the roof.

The night air welcomed me with a blast of cold autumn wind. All I could see as I stepped out onto the helipad were the dim red landing lights outlining the silhouette of the helicopter, which was little more than a discontinuity against the backdrop of stars.

"Ah, there you are."

I heard someone throw a switch, and soon I was bathed in the glaring, stark white beam of the floodlight. I immediately threw up my hand, shielding my already night-adjusted eyes from the garish glow.

"Nice to see you up and ready, Miss Integra." Walter strode out from behind the floodlight, his gloved hand pressed across his pinstriped vest as he gave me a quick bow. "Are you ready to depart?"

"As ready as I'll ever be," I muttered, squinting into the light.

"Very good. I will send for the men at once."

I watched him walk over to the intercom system in the communications booth, then let my gaze wander across the heliport with my thoughts. The sound of Walter's voice became a distant murmur as I tried to imagine what the night had in store. St. Albans was little more than ten minutes away by helicopter, so I would need to be ready to battle my first vampire almost as soon as I buckled myself into my seat.

The thought made me ill.

So lost was I within my own mind that I didn't notice Walter's approach until he cleared his throat less than a meter from my ear.

"Miss Integra, there is something we must discuss."

I shook my head, forcing myself to snap out of it. "I apologize," I said quietly. "I was thinking."

"Very deeply, I'm sure," he replied. "Miss Integra, you told me that your father never even told you of Alucard's existence until the day he died, correct?"  
I nodded slowly.

"Then let me be perfectly frank." He adjusted his gloves, then held my gaze as he stood at attention before me. "Alucard may be bound to serve your family, but the seals upon his gloves no more make him a 'good guy' than that uniform makes you a Royal Protestant Knight. Like your knighthood, his respect – and therefore unquestioning obedience – must be earned. Act quickly, decisively, and with the utmost authority, and you shall wield a weapon of unrivaled power with impunity. Falter even for a moment, and he will not hesitate to proceed however he sees fit…and you will be held solely responsible for the carnage he leaves in his wake."

I let out a slow, measured breath. Part of me wanted to beg for reassurance, but I knew it was futile. I was the head of the Hellsing family now, and there was nothing I could say or do that would make him take pity on me. "I see. Thank you, Walter."

"Ma'am." He started to give me a short bow, then paused, a small smile twitching his wrinkled lip. "Speak of the devil."

The shadow beneath my feet began to roil and writhe, and I couldn't keep myself from jumping back with a short cry. Walter gave me a sharp look, and I quickly steeled myself against the instinct to run, putting on what I could only hope was a bored, indifferent expression as I watched my servant's body take form before my eyes.

"Good evening, Alucard," Walter greeted him casually. "I must say, it's been a very long time."

"It has indeed, Walter." Red coat-tails floated on the midnight breeze as the vampire king turned to face the older man. "Forty years, I believe."

Walter chuckled and inclined his head. "Yes, sir." Dark eyes looked into the gleaming red lenses of Alucard's glasses, and a peculiar smirk fell across his aging face. "It is truly a pleasure to have you back."

A soft 'hmm' rumbled in his throat as the vampire turned his attention to me. He looked quite different from the night I had met him in the cell; long, dark hair was now cropped short beneath a crimson, wide-brimmed hat, and the black leather bodysuit had been replaced with a somewhat Victorian suit and duster. I was reminded of the picture of my grandfather that hung in my father's office, and I briefly wondered if the resemblance was intentional.

"What is our mission?" he asked. I could feel his red eyes locking onto mine from behind the thick, tinted glasses. My heart leapt into my throat, Walter's words racing through my mind as I realized I had no idea what we were up against.

"Uh…uh…" The words wouldn't come, and I felt my cheeks growing red.

"A vampire has appeared in St. Albans," Walter cut in, saving me from my own ineptitude as he went to open the door for the men who were to accompany us on our mission. "Just business as usual, sir."

"I see." Alucard ignored the commotion behind us as a handful of our soldiers climbed into the helicopter. "…my master," he murmured, taking off his hat and pressing it to his chest as he bent smoothly at the waist. "Your servant stands at the ready. Give me your command, and it shall be done."

I drew a deep breath, thankful for the mirrored glasses that stood between me and the crimson pools of emptiness. "…we do our job," I murmured, repeating what Walter had said to me less than an hour before. "We find the vampire, and we destroy it."

Razor sharp fangs glinted beneath a feral smirk as he straightened. "By your command, then, my master." He gestured to the helicopter, inviting me to board before him.

Resisting the urge to duck my head, I hurried across the helipad and hopped up into the copilot's seat, where I had seen my father sit each time he had departed for a mission. Sliding the door shut behind me, I reached up and plucked my headset from its hook, securing it over my ears as I watched Alucard and Walter exchange a few words just outside of earshot. Alucard seemed angry; dark brows met above his nose, and his lips were drawn back in a ferocious snarl as he spoke. Walter met his gaze easily as he replied, though his hands twitched at the ready despite his calm demeanor.

_I wonder what they're arguing about?_

I craned my neck, trying to see if I could decipher what they were saying. All I could make out was my name on Alucard's lips.

I groaned and sat back in my seat, feeling my cheeks go hot with a mixture of embarrassment and frustration. He probably couldn't believe his new master was a twelve-year-old little girl who didn't even have the sense to ask where she was going before she departed.

_Please, God, let me redeem myself before someone gets hurt…_

Their conversation must have ended abruptly; before I knew it, Walter was climbing into the pilot's seat beside me.

"Are you ready, miss Integra?" he asked, reaching up to flick a few switches and bring the helicopter to life.

I drew a deep breath, painfully aware of the final passenger taking his seat in the back of the cabin. "I am."

"Very good. Off we go, then." He pulled back the collective stick, easing the helicopter into the air before pressing the cyclic stick forward, and soon we were zooming off into the night.

I busied myself with looking out the window. The floodlights quickly dwindled into the distance, leaving nothing but the occasional streetlamp whizzing by below. The deafening roar of the engine seemed quiet beneath my noise-canceling headset, making my thoughts seem that much louder by comparison.

It seemed like hardly a minute had passed before Walter turned to face the crew in the back of the cabin. "We have nearly arrived. Miss Hellsing, I believe it is time for you and Alucard to engage the enemy on the ground. I will land as soon as I find a suitable site and follow you in with your men."

I felt my body go rigid as I turned to stare at him. "…don't I have to wait until you land to disembark as well?" I asked quietly, trying to keep the growing feeling of dread from my voice.

"Hardly." The older man carefully maneuvered the aircraft closer to the ground; I could see the flickering lights of the suburbs speeding toward us out of the night. "From what I understand, the creature has already killed dozens of civilians. We need to be on the scene as quickly as possible."

Before I could respond, the door beside me opened, sending a blast of evening air roaring into the cabin. Alucard perched lightly on the landing skids, arms folded carelessly across his chest as he leered down at me through his tinted glasses.

"Your hour is at hand, little Hellsing," he purred, reaching out to offer me his gloved hand. "I tasted your father's blood when we met in the cell. Show me that you are worthy to have it coursing through your veins."

In that moment, when my hands were numbly unfastening my harness as I prepared to jump from a helicopter several hundred feet above the ground, I felt my fear melt away. The reminder that I was my father's daughter ignited something within me, and for the first time since I watched his coffin being lowered into the ground, I felt like I had it in me to be strong. I let the harness fall away and pushed myself unsteadily to my feet, reaching out to take my servant's hand in mine.

Needless to say, the feeling didn't last long.

"Hold on tight," he chuckled, then let himself fall backward, catching me against his chest as we began hurtling toward the ground.

I let out a bloodcurdling scream, which was immediately swept away by the wind. I clutched desperately at the lapels of his coat, squeezing my eyes shut against the stinging gales rushing past us as we fell.

"Open your eyes." I heard his voice pierce the roar of the atmosphere screaming past my ears. "You are Integra Hellsing. You do not flinch, you do not hesitate. You will stare your enemies in the face, and you will watch without mercy as they die by your hand." I felt him twist his body so that our feet were pointed toward the ground. Knowing that he was right, I forced myself to open my eyes just as the roofs of the buildings shot past on either side. My already white knuckles clenched harder as I watched the cobbled road racing up to meet me, and I gritted my teeth as I prepared for impact.

To my surprise, the wind slowed around me, and I felt his arms tighten about my waist as he arrested our descent. A few moments later, his boots landed lightly on the ground, and he set me down on the sidewalk beside him.

The street was eerily quiet. I frowned as I looked around, releasing his crimson lapels and taking a few steps toward soft aura of the streetlamp a few dozen meters down the road. "Are you sure we're in the right place? I would have thought there would be—" My foot caught on something soft and warm, and I stumbled forward, barely managing to regain my balance with a bit of a hop. I immediately turned my attention to my feet, then let out a horrified gasp.

The ground was littered with corpses.

"Does that answer your question?" Alucard said mildly, his head swiveling as he scanned the buildings beyond the gruesome scene.

I resisted the urge to scamper back to his side, my hand finding the handle of my gun beneath my coat. "…yes, I suppose it does." The stench of blood was nauseating. I tried to keep my gaze from finding the mutilated bodies on the ground, but it was easier said than done; there were literally corpses on top of corpses piled on the street.

Alucard looked around for a moment longer, then nodded toward the end of the street. "There."

My heart immediately began to race. I followed his gaze, my palm sweating against the butt of my gun as I searched the darkness for our enemy. However, all that I could make out was the hunkered form of a child, doubled over the lifeless body of a woman.

The little boy appeared to be no more than six. Thin, dirty arms were wound around the shoulders of what I could only assume to be his mother's corpse, and a mop of shaggy brown hair fell across the face he had buried in her shoulder.

"My God…" I whispered, my hand sliding from my weapon as my heart began to break. "What sort of monster could do such a thing…"

Alucard raised an eyebrow as he looked over at me. "The very sort of monster that is draining the life from that woman."

The little boy lifted his head when he heard us speak, turning to face us in the dim light of the streetlamp. Blood dribbled from cherub-like lips, and red eyes met our gaze with morbid curiosity.

"N-no…" My voice was little more than a breath of air. "Alucard, no. It's only a child."

"Miss Integra!"

My head snapped up. Walter and the half dozen men in our entourage had come charging in from the opposite end of the street, their heavy footfalls loud in the ominously silent night. At the butler's signal, the men trained their weapons on the lone little boy, whose grubby face stared blankly at them in the moonlight.

"Give the order, Miss Integra!" Walter shouted.

My gaze darted between the child and the squadron of grown men. I felt tears stinging the backs of my eyes; how could this small boy be responsible for the mass grave at my feet?

"If you don't give the order, those men are going to die." The vampire king's voice was flat and cold.

My lips parted as my breath came faster, but the order wouldn't come. Something about that innocent, bloodstained face kept me from ordering my men to open fire. Surely the face of a child couldn't be the face of the devil…

"Integra!" Walter howled, razor wires shimmering in the light of the street lamp.

But it was too late.

I watched in horror as my men were decapitated before my eyes. The boy had moved too fast for the eye to see, his tiny body nothing more than a blur of skinny arms and legs. Walter had managed to create a meshwork shield of wires, narrowly escaping having his arm ripped off by the gnashing teeth of the child monster.

My knees gave beneath me, and I fell to the ground, tears streaming down my cheeks as I watched Walter fight for his life. I barely heard the sound of my servant calling my name; it wasn't until I saw his boot crushing the arm of the reanimated corpse reaching for my wrist that I snapped back to reality.

"The order, Integra," he growled, glaring out into a sea of glowing red eyes. The bodies around me had risen from the ground, their mottled lips parted in a low, wheedling groan as they pulled themselves toward me.

I stared into the river of death, my fingers clenching into trembling fists on the ground.

"THE ORDER, MY MASTER!" the vampire king roared. "SPEAK YOUR COMMAND, AND IT SHALL BE DONE! YOUR ENEMIES WILL FALL BEFORE YOU BY MY HAND! I WILL GRIND YOUR FOES TO DUST. I STAND BEFORE YOU, ALL OF MY GREAT POWER THE WEAPON IN YOUR HAND! SAY IT, INTEGRA FAIRBROOKE WINGATES HELLSING! SEND YOUR SERVANT INTO BATTLE!"

I looked up at him through bleary eyes. Jagged tendrils of shadow surrounded his body. Tinted glasses had faded, revealing the blazing red irises behind them. The only things that stood between him and our enemies were the fiery red seals on the backs of his gloves, and it was my command that would release him to end our foes.

"Say it, my lady!" Walter called, ripping the boy's limb from his body with a circle of razor sharp wire. The vampire stumbled only a moment, then reformed its missing leg, charging forward again with a vengeance.

I drew a deep breath. "Alucard," I whispered, feeling as if my blood had turned to ice in my veins. "Kill them. Kill them all."

A wild grin split his face. "It will be…as YOU command…my master."

I sat in numbed silence as the battle was quickly ended, barely registering the shrill, horrifying cries of the dying dead as they fell, one by one, to the street before me. I felt as if I was outside my body, watching Alucard drive his hand through the boy's torso, tearing his heart from his chest and watching with an elated grin as his body dissolved into ash about his arm. I didn't feel Walter pulling me to my feet, and I didn't notice him leading me back toward the helicopter until my hand was on the handle of the door.

"…they're dead, aren't they," I murmured, eyes falling, unblinking, to the shiny metal door.

"…yes, ma'am," Walter replied, his face a leathery mask of indifference.

"It's my fault, isn't it." My voice was dead to my own ears.

"Damn right, it is."

I flinched when I heard my servant's voice, squeezing my eyes shut as I hunched my shoulders. I wasn't allowed to hide, though. A gloved hand roughly found my shoulder, whirling me around until I was staring into the cold, red eyes of my nightmares.

"You coward," he snarled. "You are descended from the greatest men to walk this earth. You were not meant to sit on the sidewalk, cowering before your enemies like a spineless dog! Your men died because you couldn't give the order to save them. What do you have to say for yourself?!"

Not knowing what else to do, I stared into his eyes, my lips set in a quivering line. "It won't happen again," I whispered, my fists clenching at my sides. "It doesn't matter what they look like. It doesn't matter who they used to be. Whether it's a child or my own man turned into a ghoul, I will not falter." Tears streamed down my cheeks as I remembered the looks of horror on my men's face as they died, but I dared not lose my servant's gaze. "Any monster who stands before me will be crushed. I will NEVER…let something like that happen again."

His lip curled in a sneer. "See that you don't." Turning on his heel, he climbed into the now empty cabin and slammed the door.

Barely able to see where I was going, I clambered up into my seat, fumbling to hook the harness before pulling my knees up to my chest. I was suddenly exhausted; every ounce of my strength had been sapped from me, and I could already feel myself slipping off even as Walter started up the engine. The next ten minutes passed in blissful near-unconsciousness; as I finally drifted off into a troubled sleep, I was vaguely aware of the strong, red-clad arms that carried me into the mansion.

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